The International day of awesomeness

Breakfast: blueberry pancakes and OJ. (I had four and a half of these.)

Apparently today is the international day of awesomeness. (http://dayofawesomeness.com/)

WTF? My day didn't start awesome at all. My mom called me this morning and we had an unpleasant quarrel this morning. Why? I still don't know why we argued. This still confuses me. This whole thing about me and my mom. She called me and yelled at me for sleeping till 11:30 am. She then went ahead and said the only reason I want to go to grad school in US is only because I just want to get away from her control.

I mean, first of all.. Of course I wanna get away from her control. I'm fucking 22. She was demanding me to act like an adult from when I was fucking six. I mean, I don't mind that. I was prematured, and that took me very far. but what makes me upset is how she picks up fights with me just so childishly. Her voice, her tone, these whole vocabulary and sentences she's using. I'm tired.

I'm just so fucking tired.

I need a fairy god mother who would get me a green card and.. mentally support me to get into grad school here..

This situation always makes me wonder why I'm willingly choosing this mess. over my mom who wants to do everything for me, money, MD, and my home--Korea.

Maybe I'm really just acting out. Maybe this whole thing, me feeling thrilled to learn and learn and learn more about pschology.. is all just rebellious bull shit. Maybe that's just what it is.
Maybe I AM still a kid.

Well, back to the happy food story.
I went back to KOP today, since I really could not look around the mall yesterday. Yesterday I really just walked into the building, and had feast of food at their food court, then left the mall. So today, I really went there to shop and enjoy.

I walked around the mall tirelessly until the dinnertime, (this means my lunch was a cup of DD coffee w/ milk and sugar), and walked into the famous "The Cheesecake Factory" for the first time of my life. I loved the restaurant. This is actually very good idea, considering how it is extremely hard to find various bakeries in American suburb. Korea was FILLED WITH bakeries. Especially Seoul. The city had cakes and pastrys available for me on every corners. Hell all the coffee places had to have cakes to go with their espresso drinks. But American starbucks has muffin, scones, cookies, donughts, and cupcakes instead. I'm sure New York and other cities in US will have great cake places here and there, but it is true that many suburbs don't get to have much choices of baked goods unless they go to grocery store for some. (This is why these American people are so good at baking stuff in their home.)

So I think this big restaurant that has so many kind of cheesecakes and good food just works perfect in this country. Less supply=More Demand.



I had some fresh fish tacos.. and I only had one of these tacos, and ate some bread. (Oh, and I cleaned out all the black beans, salsa, guacamole, and those rice.
Then I had a bite of tiramisu cheese cake, and a glass of red wine. This wine is called FAT CAT. Isn't it so adorable? Oh, and that cute little bunny was a present for me from my bf. He came all the way to the mall just to get me that cute little thing and have dinner with me, and drive me back to home.

So yes. I guess my day was awesome in some ways. My friend who thanked me for many things I have done for her paid half of a pair of shoes I normally wouldn't dare to get because they're so expensive for my budget. (75$)

But my sister is sick. and I'm never gonna make my mom happy. and on top of this, some racist fatties in cheesecake factory said, "asians should not come to US if they don't speak English," and bitched about China and North Korea for a while. so I'm in a bad mood.
I am.

but it's ok.

Because I can still stand proud about what I've become. And what I will be.
and this is awesome enough.

Were you awesome today?
I'm sure you were.

Oh, and here is some confession for you.
I had some of this raspberry white chocolate truffles cheese cake. I shared it with my bf and I also worked out after eating it. so... we cool? I really wanna rotate my pictures.